I Felt a Funeral in my Brain...

Silence cuts through my brain, it's happening again. I welcome the familiar feeling…I'm not trying to sound poetic, I'm just writing what goes on in my head :/

I love poetry, it has some sort of 'sanctity' to me, and few people get the chance to love what they study.. I guess I happen to be one of the selected few.

One poetess that seemed to touch me on profound personal level is Emily Dickinson. The way she put loneliness and alienation in her poetry is very deep and accurate.. you could really feel the pain/sarcasm in her poetry, I guess the 'secret' is, she really experienced what it feels like to be lonely, others mostly imagine it. One more thing about Emily is how she 'rejected' society and chose to live alone. She detected the hypocrisy in the social 'pleasantries'…I know how that feels , how it can make you cringe away.

One favorite poem by Emily is number 280 ( She did not title her poems, they were first published after she passed away). This poem is about 'descending' into insanity because of grief.

I felt a Funeral, in my Brain,
And Mourners to and fro
Kept treading -- treading -- till it seemed
That Sense was breaking through --

And when they all were seated,
A Service, like a Drum --
Kept beating -- beating -- till I thought
My Mind was going numb --

And then I heard them lift a Box
And creak across my Soul
With those same Boots of Lead, again,
Then Space -- began to toll,

As all the Heavens were a Bell,
And Being, but an Ear,
And I, and Silence, some strange Race
Wrecked, solitary, here --

And then a Plank in Reason, broke,
And I dropped down, and down --
And hit a World, at every plunge,
And Finished knowing -- then --

The poem ends with '-then', I think this is really central to emphasis the poem's thesis, that is 'the horrors of insanity' .. it's like her mind stopped or went blank in her turmoil *sigh*